Saturday, October 20, 2007

Where's mine?



"And I sit here, listening to everyone else's love story.... And thinking.... Where's mine?"
Whoa! It really hit me hard on the face. I just read this short message from my cousin and it really made me ponder on things. I guess, that stupe really intended to destroy my day. Oh well, I'm afraid to admit, but she really succeeded on that. After reading that short message, I came to question myself. What is really wrong with me? I dont think I've got less than those other girls there. In fact, my mother always tells me that I have more. Whoa..., thanks to her. At least I've developed my self-confidence after all these years. But really, I always don't understand why until now nothing has yet thrilled me like those of my friends. Well, it's not that I'm in a hurry or something. In fact I'm even too young for that. But, oh well, blame this sentiment to my dearest cousin.
One of my friends used to tell me that I just look mean and brave that no one dares to approach me. Is it really the reason? Will I have to change the way I walk or talk? Or do I have to always wear a smile while walking (then everybody will think I've already lost my sanity...tsk,tsk...) Or worse, do I have to be flirty or something? Eewww..... I just can't imagine myself playing charming and cute in front of the guys. Huh... why am I making this hard for myself? Well, actually, this is just to express how I really feel. It's just not so fair. I never intended to make good grades and dress up to be left out and not being noticed. Now, you think that I'm the kind of girl who want to be noticed and get good impressions. Please don't. Consider me as just a confused young lass who is still not bound into the real things in life.
Oh well, I know it will just come. And when it does, I want it to be worth the wait. But as of yet, let me just continue playing my sentimental side. What is taking him so long? Why has everybody found theirs already? Where is mine?

1 comment:

marix said...

hahahahhh...it's good to hear I wasn't the only one having the same sentiment. Don't worry Jan, na-traffic lang sya....

BTW, did you apply as a writer in the yearbook (i've forgotten it already, it's been so long)? If I were the EIC, I'll really let you write, you write very well, keep it up...

Marix