Tuesday, January 15, 2008


There is a heavy downpour of rain outside; thunder come rolling like an angry monster; and lightning clashes like a bolt. The strom has come in time of my despondency, as if sharing with my agony. As I hear the heavy raindrops o the roof, I can't help but think of our conversation earlier.

"He said he's so in-love with me... Oh..., I just didn't know what to say!" she said this dreamily, and I almost cried. How could he say that to her? I thought those words are only for me?

""Well, I think he really meant it," I said. And I thought-- did he also mean it when he said it to me?

"I think he did! Oh.., I'm the luckiest woman on earth!".... And I am the most unfortunate....

Several questions came flooding out of my mind. Many 'what-ifs" kept on bugging me. What if I just fought for how I feel? What if he still loves me? But I can never turn back the time. I've been such a coward, and now, I'm suffering the consequences. But what else can I do? Which love am I going to choose and which love am I going to give up? That I feel for this dear girl, or that I have with that man, which can surely hurt this girl. I am too scared to risk and so I chose to do what I think is right?

"....... and then we went to his parents' house and..... hey..., are you listening.....?"

"Y-yeah... of course... I-I'm just not feeling well, I guess...," I lied.

And then I thought..., how many times do I still have to lie?

-to be continued-

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