Is this a sign?

Dear Person Concerned,

I don't know how to start with this... but here it goes...

We've been friends long enough, and I have seen you grow up. I was there when you had your first answer from love line, and I was also there when the line went dead. I didn't see you as a man yet then.

Now, things have changed. Things happened swiftly; but gradually, I found myself falling. I tried to no avail to suppress my feelings. But my heart just won't let me. I suddenly realized that all my roads are leading to you. Fate even went to such high lengths just to play this big joke on me. I found it easier to dream about you and think about you, than facing you at all.

Now, things went off hand. I know something went wrong along the way. It wasn't your fault, but I don't want to take all the blame either. You were really nice to me, but sometimes you tend to humiliate me also. And I just hate it! How can I believe you when you were so inconsistent right from the start? I know you were not also sure about your feelings for me.. it's okey. I understand somehow. It doesn't take a genius to see how impossible it is for someone like you to actually like me. It means not very likely to happen for reasons so obvious.

Now, I found myself wishing it did not happen at all. How I wish you did not start noticing me the way you did before. I wish you did not say those things you told me. I swear I could have believed you; but I also know that what i want would never happen at all. How I hope you did not strat flirting with me. It seems so real, I could've believed every touch was genuine, every gesture was meant. I shouldn't have crossed the line between friendship and "the next level". I shouldn't have allowed myself to get tied so tightly to that hope that Cupid is cooking something wonderful for us, for now I have a hard time breaking free.

Now, I want to ask something from you... just one thing please... "Can you please stop picking on me?" I don't know, but when ti comes to you, I started getting confused on what is the real thing and what is the joke. I am having a hard time acting casually when you are around. Just please start treating me like the others. i can really feel that you are keeping your distance from me. It's okey, I will not run after you anyway. But hey! Just remember that I'll be just right here. And when you feel like turning around, then you'll see me.... always ready to give out a hand.

('-')