Thursday, April 17, 2008

My Greatest Fear

"Janisha, you are most afraid of not being good enough."


You're more concerned about how others perceive you than many people around you. You sometimes worry more than you should about doing things perfectly or feel afraid that others will mock you in some way.

Thus, says my Tickle Test. And yep..., that is exactly what I am most afraid of. I am afraid that what I am doing is not good enough for others. Whenever I do things I would often wonder what other people would think about it. I am always concerned about the effect of these things to others, and what their reactions would be. I super hate criticisms, though I am a very keen critic myself. I hate it when people do not appreciate my efforts and say ill things about me. I think, this is one thing that prevents me from taking chances, even though I know that what I'm thinking would likely to succeed. I am more concerned about how others perceive me or the things that I do. I am not exactly trying to always make the best impressions. But, as much as possible I want the people's notion of me to be good enough.

I always want my works to be almost perfect, and I want things to go as smoothly and perfectly as I want it to be. I don't want things to be flawed and inadequate. If things turn out like this, I would feel bad about myself and feel guilty about it. I believe that if things are not done almost perfectly, it is done by a loser. Yup..., I really think that way. I even often consider myself a loser at that. There can really be times when I feel I am worthless, but I know that this is just a product of worrying too much and thinking that I am not doing the right thing. Whoa! Anyhow, I am really trying to work this out. This is still me, myself, and I, nonetheless. (",)

3 comments:

Xio said...

Well everybody has something to... hurdle. But please don't be too hard on yourself. Screw up. Have fun. Life's freaking short. ;>

janjie said...

Tnx Xio... That made me ponder... hmmmnn...

Xio said...

Just being the best B.I. I can be. ;p